Well, Ladies and Gents I’ve been away for a while, but I’m finally ready to pick up my laptop and continue where I left off. My last post was shared on November 7th, 2017 – 15 days, after that the rug was snatched out from under me. My boyfriend and I officially broke up. After 4 1/2 years of focusing solely on one person, I had an extremely hard time transitioning into “the single life”. That’s understandable, right? After weeks of reflection, I realized two things.
- I’d spent so much time focusing on him that I was okay with putting my dreams and aspirations on the back burner. Compromising was second nature to me and I honestly thought that that was acceptable. That’s what people do in real life relationships right? No.
- I forgot how much of a bad ass I AM. I guess always having to check in with someone before I made any major decisions caused me to hesitate with certain opportunities and not participate in as many events as I wanted to.
If anything, I’ve learned a lot of major lessons after being in that relationship. At this point in my life, I am my only priority and my own MVP. I do what I want because I’m grown or whateva! I am unconcerned with the feelings of men and what they think about the decisions that I make from this point on. Sis, I’m completely unbothered. If they have an issue with what I’m doing then they can go. Bye! Be blessed!
In one month I will turn the big 2-8 and guess what: I have no man or husband prospects anywhere near the horizons. Now, if you ask any older woman to them my future is damn near doomed to a house full of cats. Technically I love the kitties, but I couldn’t disagree more. I definitely think that pop culture and society is obsessed with the portrayal pigeonholing the single woman in her 20s, as a poor pitiful woman who can’t find a man. Sounds familiar, doesn’t it? I’m sure you can think of at least three movies where some pathetic single girl spends her time watching Netflix, eating pizza, and drinking wine manless as she cries alone on a Saturday night.
I for one, am OVER IT. Before you get all crazy and call me a man hater, let me be clear. I plan on getting married and having a family one day. I do believe, however, that being single is important and exhilarating and maybe, just maybe, single women aren’t sitting around stuffing our faces with pizza waiting desperately for prince charming. It’s 2018, ain’t nobody got time for that. Believe it or not, some of us enjoy being single, I mean why not… we’re in our prime! Most importantly, before you can declare that you love another person, you have to be 100% accepting yourself, flaws and all. As my 28th birthday looms closer, I want to share my top 28 reasons why being single in your 20s is awesome sauce.
You have time to be selfish and focus on you. You can spend your days focusing on your dreams and aspirations. Figure out who you are as a person and live your best life!
2. Nothing holds you back from prospective opportunities. You are your main priority. AKA you’re a grown ass woman – do whatever you want mama!
3. Self-love is the best love. You learn how to love yourself and not depend on others for YOUR happiness. Accepting and loving yourself is extremely important.
4. You learn that everything doesn’t have to be perfect, it’s okay to make mistakes. Hold yourself accountable and never settle for less than you deserve.
5. You learn how to truly be independent. Relying solely on yourself pushes you to figure things out on your own.
6. There’s no drama, heartbreak or BS.
7. You realize who and what is important. You appreciate the people in your corner who love and support you unconditionally.
8. Experiment! Try out that funky hair color you like, change your style, lose yourself and find your way back.
9. Understand that life is one big adventure. Be open to meeting new people and traveling. The world in your oyster – just do you!
10. Sis, you don’t have to answer to anyone, for any damn thing. Realistically, who checking you boo? No DAMN BODY.
11. Vacation anyone? Go on that road trip, take that job across the country, you can do whatever you want because right now you’re living for no one but yourself.
12. You can focus on your career. No hesitations or guilt. Do you want to work late? DO IT. Change jobs? DO IT. Move to a new city? DO IT.
13. You get the whole bed to yourself.
14. You can date. When you’re ready you can date a little, date a lot, whatever floats your boat. You can step outside of the box and date different types of people. Issa vibe.
15. You can be the single girl who drinks wine, eats pizza and binge watches Netflix. That’s cool too!
16. You get to flirt with the sexy waiter. It’s totally acceptable to have crushes. You can kiss strangers too if you’re into it. Just be safe!
17. No need to shave your legs… or anything else. Nuff said.
18. Learn to accept yourself 100%. Self-love is the best love. Accept your flaws and introduce yourself to your inner badass. Let her meet the rest of the world.
19. Explore your passions!
20. Just WOOSAH. Don’t spend your days worrying about settling down and starting a family. Just live in the moment and have fun.
21. Better yourself. Learn something new, take a cooking class. Learn how to fend for yourself sis.
22. Spend time with your family. You’ll see your family during every holiday. Get to know them in your adult life.
23. Your free time belongs to YOU. Do whatever the hell you want. Go to brunch with your girls, read, find a new hobby, date, etc.
24. Your accomplishments are your own. You did it all by yourself girl.
25. More money for # 1. What happens during the holidays when you’re manless. You buy more stuff for yourself. Duh!
26. Uninterrupted bedtime reading. Yes, I really want to read this book. No, that is not an invitation to come and join me.
27. No tabs. Want to go to the club and not return home until noon the next day? No problem. Nobody is keeping tabs, live your life sis.
28. You’re free. Move forward and consistently try to become the best version of yourself. When you are ready to start over, never settle for less than you deserve. For now, just enjoy being young, single, and free.